Here goes the olde English major in me again. "Satisfying" is one of those words that everyone knows but when I began to attach it to prayer, I just started shaking my head like "I don't know..." So I looked it up in Webster's online dictionary and here's what is says:
Definition of SATISFY
transitive verb
1 a : to carry out the terms of (as a contract) : discharge b : to meet a financial obligation to
2 : to make reparation to (an injured party) : indemnify
5a : to conform to (as specifications) : be adequate to (an end in view) b : to make true by fulfilling a condition <values that satisfy an equation> <satisfy a hypothesis>
intransitive verb
As I looked at each definition, it reminded me of the Lord's Prayer. Forgive those who sin against you. But the definition that would best describe the most satisfying prayer would be 4 a : convince b : to put an end to (doubt or uncertainty) : dispel
It's been rare. I could almost count them out on one hand, but there have been some moments in prayer, usually at my most distraught moments, that I've heard His voice. Only a word, maybe two. My doubt ends, I am convinced and my uncertainty is dispelled. It's such a great moment.
Why are those moments so rare? I think it's because I keep it together most of the time, relying on my own resources, my own abilities, and my own cognitive and emotional tools to weave my way through this life. But in those moments when all my tools have failed and I'm at the end of my "self," I can pray with honesty, "Lord, I don't know what to do!" Then, maybe then, He answers. He satisfies. He satisfies.
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